Tag Archives: Superstes

Update – 18 Months AgoMy Journey with Cauda Equina Syndrome Began

18 Months Ago…

On Feb 11, 2013, I had never heard of Cauda equina syndrome (CES). That changed the next day. This very day, 18 months ago, I awoke with no feeling below my waist. Something very wrong was going on with my body! I didn’t know it then, but I was beginning the journey called Cauda Equina Syndrome.

On this blog I’ve chronicled the first year of that journey. I have been very blessed in my recovery, especially given that it took 14 days to have my decompression surgery and not having ANY feeling below my waist. I won’t cover the details of what has been written before, but this update gives a quick look at my progress since the one year mark.

Many neurosurgeons and other physicians say that nerve regeneration only occurs for 12 months, while others say 12 - 18 months is the time in which what healing will happen does happen. My physical therapist told me 18 - 24 months. I don’t know if this is “frontline” info or whether she was just trying to motivate me further than I already was.

For me, the months since my 1 year anniversary have been challenging with some minor regression – but, I am still seeing spurts of significant regeneration taking place. I went through a period of frequent nerve pain in the top of my right foot. This seemed to be aggravated by my evening commute, which is usually around 1 hora, 10 minutes. The last 10 - 15 minutes of the drive I would get the “electro-shock” feeling so familiar from other body parts earlier in my recovery.

These were so painful I almost became a dangerous driver. I fell back on my flight training skills – ABC – Aviate (Fly the plane, in this case, drive the car – make sure you don’t run into someone or something), Navigate (Don’t get lost and for the car it means make sure you don’t miss a turn while distracted), Communicate (In the air, we’d get help from controllers on the ground, in the car, this just means Comfort – try to find a position where the pain subsides. Those pains left me about a month ago. As they left, they presented me with a going away present of more feeling in my feet. I now only have impaired feeling in a ½ - ¾ inch band around my foot, beginning about ½ inch above the bottoms of the feet (my toes excepted as they have had feeling for some time.)

My legs have feeling back except for the backs of the legs and inner portion of the buttocks, but only the lower ½ of that and the corresponding front area. That too is a recent improvement. I am now able to walk without assistive device for over 100 pedes,, but my legs and hips are completely exhausted by the effort and are in moderate pain by the end. But I am improving, slowly but surely, I continue to strengthen and improve.

I still cannot stand for more than 20 - 30 seconds, nor sit for more than an hour without problems. This limits my ability to travel and is sorely missed (no pun intended.) I keep pushing to improve. If I don’t, I won’t know how much I can improve. So I work full time, with 2 hours round trip commute time. And I walk whenever I can, to the point of not being able to any more. By the time I get home I am exhausted. I still have not had to have surgery on the torn tendon in my right foot.

Despite that, God has allowed me to lead small groups and classes at church. I am truly blessed. None of us who are afflicted with CES want to stay as we are. We learn to deal with the injury and we fight to overcome as much of its affects as possible. It is easy to look around, seeing people who do not appreciate the simple act of being able to walk. Or run. Or stand for a few minutes. Or travel 6 hours to visit with old friends or many other things. Looking at these will surely lead to defeat, depression, and a downward spiral. Look at what we can accomplish instead! Life is different, not over. It isn’t fair, but then we’ve known that for a long time. I choose to let my disability strengthen me, rather than define me. I challenge you to choose your goal and work for it!


Cauda equina syndrome – Improvisa requiem

I really didn't want to believe it...

Sed hodie, pro certo.

Last week, Et occupavit problems ratiunculam. Now that really helps when I've also got a torn peroneal et obstipuerit in ius ankle! Usquam, Thursday mea vespere: Cauda equina syndrome In ante adipiscing - Lorem ipsum dolor sit mihi crevit in dextri / ankle (nerve dolor, muscle cramps, phantasticum dolor - ex eo omnes,).

ps21v14Et cogitaverunt in die sabbati, et miratus sum cum sero, paulo ante tempus requiescendi, Reversusque est cum magno discrimine ad decrescebat dolorem!! I went to bed thinking it to be a fluke. I didn't mention it to my wife because I thought it was just one of those transitory things we get when we suffer with CES.

Sed dominico, ipsum dolor low. We went on to church and came home. I waited for the pain to increase... After returning home from church Sunday evening I was very hopeful that a permanent change had occurred, sed tamen ego illud tempus,.

In hac vigilia matutina,, Si mei non cessas evellere, ego autem eos posse nervus currunt. Of course my legs wouldn't let me run anyway, sed iam supra 36 horas - pede felis, dixisse satis dolor in melius mutatus. All of this just after the 1 marcam. In fact, ut post hanc, Cras signat, 1 anno anniversarium de manu mea decompression.


I've also regain some feeling in the back (enervant;) area sinistram tibiam - that's new feeling too! So progress continues. God has a wonderful sense of timing - vno modo putas stimulandi, Det vobis, ut in alium. And that encouragement reaches out and stretches itself right into the area you need it to go. So that is a double blessing! Gratias tibi ago, Dominus!

Continuing the walk...




CES | Month 11 et caudam equinam, Syndrome

Month 11 habet avolasse (Fusce ut est 12 tantum, et sic demum post).


Month 10 res aliqua mala fieri in finem vitae meae. Hi in diebus potissimum mense, 11 etiam. I was dealing with the feelings caused by my Familia member and also a friend. Sed de his duobus, contritis Amicitia hurt far more. The relationship with my family member had been on a long slow descent with an abrupt, sed multa, cliff at the end. The broken friendship is something that I didn’t see coming… a total surprise and shock. We’ve all been there before, sed quia homo ita factus est in corde meo fecisti Romanis tale claudere.


.unknowingNec rupta amicitia, but it remains that way to this day. For almost a month, I didn’t know how I would feel should my friend ask for forgiveness. Eventually, the hurt receded. This allowed me to align my feelings with my caring for this person. I am now at the point where I can forgive my friend should they ask for it. I can also continue the friendship; quod tamen non esset, quo tempore proxime ante ... Nil mihi credas velim, quo vita in meam amicis satis ut permitteret eos mendaces. Perhaps I never will be. The really sad part is that I don't think this person has the first clue that they've done anything to hurt me.




Natalis came and went during Month 11. We had a nice, quiet time - sed older mihi, the more I miss having a family that loves one another. We don’t have children and that puts us in a lonely place too. I come from a very dysfunctional family. Perhaps that is why I have such revulsion for liars. My family’s holiday gatherings (Lorem & Natalis) semper ipsum ostendit, ubi misit ad omnes qui habitabant in specie et de mendacio, quod eramus normalis, caring family. The rest of the year told a different, sad story. I survived, sed non sine vulnere, by getting out. 2014 notat meum 21st centum annos vivere, (nunc in mille) of miles from family. If you rule out the “visits” when they were just bringing my Mom to see me, et colligunt eam, Hinc possumus quotiens digitis me visitavit in familiam 21 annis. I, autem, saltem duodecim vicibus visitasti.

Sed ad CES ...

Sane me, dum vidit, et non sentiunt tali Frankenstein, it seems I had such a poor gait that I tore a tendon in my right ankle. Now that I have some feeling there, Nervus dolorem aliud novi Cauda equina syndrome was going on. The Doc said only surgery will fix it, but for now I’m only wearing an ankle brace. Had I noticed this earlier last year I would have had the surgery, sed quod suus 'a novus annus, with a new insurance deductible. And of course I’m on a high deductible plan (non electio - est omnibus dico: offert).

I have regained feeling in a lot of areas. The results of the nerve conductivity tests showed most of the L4/L5 damage has healed. This was the level at which the disk blew out, so I happy with that finding. However the points below L4/L5 still show significant injury and the jury is still out as to what will happen with those areas. I do have more “Quod electrica inpulsa"Lorem animum, mostly in my right foot. The backs of my thighs and lower buttocks are still numb as is most of my genital area. B&B est magnis condimentum exitus (ut vesica & INTESTINUM, nec Bed & Lorem ipsum).

Et consolati, ut Month 11 concluserat, a numero Biblicis we’re doing in our home. Between that and studying for my CMA ipsum in February, I haven’t had much time for other things or maintaining relationships. I’ll be so glad once this exam is taken. I’ve had to give up some things – things I love doing - on the schedule in order to concentrate on these. After the exam, Paratus sum super duobus aliis inceptis elit, et faciam: ut elit manere.

Numquid circa caudam equinam, Syndrome ex hoc omnes? Definitely! Does it help shape my life? Absolutely! Is it defining me? In some small way… it is a part of me, just as my arms or legs are. Yes, Et dies mali, corpora simul affectu - non tam spe simul! Through it all I rely on God’s love to see me through. In His love He knew that my back would be injured and He used that event to prod me to grow closer to Him. He has sustained me, me nutrivit,, and lifted me up. I am a better person, at a better place in life because of God taking the lemons of Cauda Equina Syndrome and helping me make lemonade out of them. Where that will lead I do not know, sed quid ego valebat!

Cauda equina Syndrome plus damni

Sometimes it just doesn't seem to end.moving-forward-quotes253

Sicut erat in regrowth nervi damnum mihi cauda equina Syndrome, I was able to feel a pain in my right ankle that wasn't like the pain in my other ankle nor the other side of my right one. Natalis est sedatus ante me. Dr. putaverunt se nervus dilacerata & iubet a test nervi conduction (Quantum ad damnum nervus praesenti) et quod rectum est in an MRI ankle. Probat autem justorum a nativitate domini.

Heri redii, ut ad exitum Doctoris. Non laedas - tamen multum; et obstipuerit - et captum, adeo ut laniatu erit enim ipsum intuere. Sed ut dolor sit iustus coepi novum ex sinum demandavi sumptu annum. Si quid est in sinu Poet. Postquam 4 surgeries et RECONCINNO anno, inter me et Kim, fundas sunt nuda. Dei providentia sperare itaque. Nihil cautum nec ipsum =.

blessings-healing-mercies-lauras-story-song-lyrics-the-positive-pear1So I'm wearing a brace and have order to take it easy. Dr. patuit ad pedem motus, ut non liceat mihi, cum aliqua operatio eu (ex quibus non aliqua maxime cauda equina syndrome). An dicturus sum non esse dicebat, si malus fuerit labor dies quam bonum, tunc erit tempus operetur.

Et non est in salute - non enim misit portans ponderis, 3 hebdomades, misit enim ambulantes, 3 plures septimanas,, plantae autem in navicula 3 plures septimanas, et corporalis justo. Nunc in dolor id ipsum.

Unde, ad caudam equinam syndrome meum? The inflammation of my superficial peroneal nerve restricted how far upwards I could bend my right foot, cum captus procedere cum pede, propter impedimentum, quod peccatum meum, et deinceps genu ankle, ut debet,. Once it hit that point, quantumque "volumen" ad imum (Ius) latus ankle. This caused a lot of motion in bad ways on the tendon, et tandem facit ut lacrima.

Ut nos, et deinceps. So far this has affected the speed and length of my walking. We'll see what else it affects. But in this, et in omnibus his,, my wife and I trust God's plan for us. And we praise Him and continue to walk, etsi lentius, cum illo in via,.